cracked – Part II

Cracked.  Our skin has dried out so much that it has cracked.  Raw. Peeling. Bleeding.  Sore.  How did we get to this point?  Through neglect? Trying to  remember….

The body in which we reside in this lifetime is now mostly covered with a combination of (presumably) self-inflicted wounds as well as a bright red rash (which we’ve been told is caused by stress), made even redder by our incessant scratching and picking. I’d guess 80% of our skin from the neck down is damaged at this very moment. That does not include pre-existing scars. It seems that one–possibly more–of the K’s has been self-harming, and this just might be the worst it’s ever been. I have no memory of it being more severe than this, ever, in all our years.

Granted, none of these are life-threatening injuries. But. It’s worrisome that these wounds are so varied. There are cuts, plus scratches and bruises and holes and even burns. Dark, bloody scabs encase us. We look positively scary.  I personally was appalled when I first saw our reflection in the mirror.  We are utterly repulsive.

Took ourselves to the doctor at some point, and she gave us some cream to use.  The cream is to dry up the rash….but it’s dried everything up.  Our skin is ruined.  No amount of lotion can soften this burlap bag of a body we find ourselves wrapped in.  This is a nightmare.  What’s worse– ugly red bumps from a stress-induced rash, or cracked and peeling skin from the cure?  Neither option is appealing to us.

Wonder if our skin will ever look “normal” again…

Wonder if anything will ever be “normal” again.