Meet The Kellie

The following blog post was written three months ago, but K was too chicken to publish it because we all think it sounds conceited and cocky. However, ever since this was written, the personality described therein has been coming out more and more frequently.  We think it might be because we’re losing weight at the moment- 25 pounds gone!-and we’re getting our figure back.  Someone called us “sexy” and it triggered something in our head, and now The Kellie is back among the active alters. Here’s the blog post and what we know about her:

TK drawing

On New Year’s Eve, one of our alters came out whom we’d not seen in a long time. She’s known as The Kellie. I know she was here because A) She tweeted once or twice and B) We were co-conscious and could see & hear some of what she was doing and C) Husband told me all about it. I think I’d like to do a blog post about her. She used to be one of our mains but has been hiding for about 3 years… Until now. We know lots about her, for she used to write in journals frequently and did sketches and paintings and loves getting her picture made, and also because people talk about her; she’s very popular. We’ve heard lots of stories. So yeah, maybe I’ll do a post about her since she’s been appearing recently. It’s fun having her back. We like her. She possesses many of the qualities that the other K’s wish we had.

As you know, if you’ve read this blog before, we have Multiple Personality Disorder. Several times throughout this blog, we’ve mentioned The Kellie, but we’ve never gone into any details about her. She was with us regularly for a long time and we got to know her pretty well, because The Kellie kept 3 different diaries, including an illustrated journal, and also because of her reputation and the stories we have heard about her. I thought maybe I’d talk about her today, while I can still remember these things. To be honest, she’s ticked off that she wasn’t introduced first. She hasn’t been out in a long time, until recently, but boy when she comes out, do sparks fly!

The Kellie is popular and confident and sexy and outrageously flirtatious, and she’s a bit of a diva. She is shamelessly hedonistic as well as  narcissistic. She spends hours primping, but when she goes out, be it to a dance club or the grocery store, she’s always dressed to impress. Her style is usually referred to as “goth” but she’s quite glam too. She wears lots of textures which beg to be touched-velvets, angora, faux furs, leathers, feather boas…and usually she’s dressed mostly in black. She’s always perfectly manicured and pedicured and her skin is silky smooth and porcelain-like (she does NOT self-harm), sometimes with silver shimmers on her shoulder blades and cleavage. She’s tattooed (not in color; the tats are all black) and pierced and has long, thick, bright red hair which she often wears in dreadlocks or spiral curls or even dozens of little braids down nearly to her waist. She has an hour-glass figure and can really rock a corset. She wears clothes that stand out in a crowd, and often wears hats or wigs of all colors. Her makeup is quite dramatic-heavy eye makeup and sometimes gemstones glued on her cheekbones or at the corners of her eyes. The Kellie will wear body glitter and henna tattoos along with her excessive amount of silver jewelry. She almost always has on what she calls her “Fuck Me Red” lipstick and while her eye shadow colors can be outrageous and bright, she always has thick curly black lashes-except for when she wears some of her many fake pairs-like purple feather lashes or rhinestoned lashes. The Kellie is pretty much always wearing platform shoes, be it a shoe or a boot; she adores “stripper shoes”.

She loves to go to gay bars and go dancing, and to raves and gothic/industrial nights and BDSM events as well. She’s certainly not shy and (when we were single) would buy a man a drink or ask him out if she found one she liked. Now The Kellie is a huge flirt and will flirt with absolutely anyone and everyone, but in truth she’s always been ridiculously picky, even to the point of being shallow. She hung out with the hippest, prettiest, wittiest, most talented people she could find.  She mostly (always?) dated younger men, and almost every one was an artist of some type-usually a musician. She dated a great deal, but she usually didn’t sleep with the guys she dated-she’s definitely hard to get.  Yes, she’s sometimes called a tease. 

The Kellie is 26 years old and does not age, thin but curvy, beautiful, witty, quotes poetry, paints and draws, designs clothes, and creates functional art. She does modeling for artists-painters and sculptors and fine-art photographers, and she also does fetish modeling. The Kellie is very sexual and throughout our 20’s she entered a club or party on the prowl, seeking her victim for the night. She usually ended up surrounded by several men, and she’d play her games with their minds and get free drinks and phone numbers which she never ever called. The Kellie has a reputation for being a heart-breaker, and she really did hurt a lot of men throughout the years. (We’re ashamed of that) She was a regular on the club circuit and all the bartenders knew The Kellie as well as the club owners, the doormen, even the cage dancers.

The Kellie is a free-lance artist (she doesn’t have a “real” job) who’s had shows here and there and who is known for her highly-detailed erotic “surrealist pop art”. She’s been designing tattoos since high school and even apprenticed for tattoo artists twice. She loves drag shows and actually believes herself to be a drag queen trapped in a woman’s body. (My psychiatrist thinks this might actually be a separate alter) The Kellie loves smoking from her long, sequined cigarette holder and drinking champagne, especially while taking bubble baths. People love The Kellie. She’s a lot of fun. Sometimes, too much fun.

The Kellie has done more than a little dabbling in drugs, she’s a recovering addict who LOVES to play and probably still can’t say no to a line of cocaine or a tab of Ecstasy. God that’s hard to admit. I don’t use drugs and I’m ashamed to say that any of our alters do. In her hey day, The Kellie owned a house and everyone came there to hang out and party after all the clubs and bars had closed. The Kellie had lots of friends-everyone seems to know her or know someone who knows her. She dated a good number of DJ’s so she had excellent access to music, and used to own a vast collection of vinyl records, many imports, mostly club music-techno and trance, house, ambient, industrial- lots of stuff you can dance to. There is always music around The Kellie. 

She was always invited to the biggest and best parties, art openings, night clubs, whatever event was going on, and she often made an appearance at such functions. She always arrives fashionably late and boy does she know how to make an entrance! All eyes are on her when she enters the room. She’s the chick every guy wants to date and every girl wants to be friends with.  She’s a social butterfly and will float around a place, giving out hugs and kisses and compliments and always smiling and being “camera ready”. I have lots of pictures of her (with many different boyfriends) as she loves being the center of attention, and usually she is. She’s very witty and a great conversationalist and she jokes around a lot, and she’s certainly not afraid to speak her mind, even if it offends someone.

The Kellie has always been inside us (the earliest appearance of her was when we were in elementary school), but she came out and stayed with us sometime around our college years, but not while we were enrolled. The Kellie was the most dominant K for most of our 20’s. We thought she’d disappear when K turned 30 and we mourned the loss of our body’s youth, but she didn’t, she just came out less often. The Kellie still made appearances at special events and parties, and she’d stay out all weekend if a boy came over. She continued to create artwork and model, but this happened less and less frequently.

The last time we remember The Kellie being out for an extended time was about 4 years ago; she came out to attend a Halloween ball at a large nightclub in the city in which we used to live. Everyone seemed so excited to see her, as she’d disappeared and moved away suddenly, and no one had seen or heard from her in quite some time. The Halloween ball was a lot of fun, and The Kellie was her usual charming self, surrounded by boys (and girls too!) wanting to buy her drinks. She did a great deal of flirting, as is her way, and dancing, but she used no drugs (except alcohol and pot) and went home alone.

The following Easter, she came out for a day and night to attend a fetish convention in Atlanta, GA. We only saw her once after that night; she did a (clothed) photo shoot for an up-and-coming artist in a smaller city. I don’t remember when that was. Two years ago? We can’t remember. We very often miss The Kellie, since she had so many friends and was so much fun and carefree and more than that, she has something the rest of us long for but don’t have–self-confidence.


This blog post was written by The Narrator and later approved by The Kellie.